[[*Fading To Black*]]

Saturday, January 30, 2010

[[unable to understand things..]]

what is wrong with me?
everything.

i dont know too..
you know..how you tell me things is like rubbing salt to my wound..

im selfish, im greedy, im a big fat pain in the ass..
i dont know how ling this can last.. really..

my heart misses the warmth u gave me when we started. misses the care and attention you give..

sometimes, i rather im always crying infront of you, so that i could get all the attention and warmth and care and almost everything that i always wanted from you.

looking at his blog, every single things he said, how i wish i had this from you..

sometimes i really hate myself..
why do i need to be like this? so freaking attention seeking..
i dont know what i can do more to make you feel good anymore..
i dont know how to make myself happy anymore..
i dont know how to get a life anymore...

its now just a lifeless me..
everyone is saying that..

he spends every single minute thinking and missing his gf...
he spends 75% of his time with her..
trying his best to accompany her all the time..

me? i only know how to complain, how to wait, how to be upset...
that is me?
change?
im not sure..
i dont even wanna try.. cus i dont know what will i get back from..

lesser and lesser time from you?

stupid me..
really freaking stupid idiotic me..
i hate myself to the core..
till sometimes.. i wonder..
why do i always get in and out of love..
why am i even on this planet..
sigh...

[[Walking Alone On This Endless Road]]*|8:27 AM|

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